Getty ImagesDia Dipasupil
Good morning exclusively to Michelle Obama in head-to-toe Balenciaga, including THIGH HIGH SPARKLING BOOTS on her last stop of the Becoming tour at the Barclay Center.
Happy holidays ONLY to the former first lady and current first everything in my heart, in a canary yellow wrap dress and, I repeat for those who are just still reeling from joy, SPARKLING GOLD THIGH HIGH BOOTS.
Blessings and salutations solely to Michelle Obama dressed like the concept of light itself! Michelle Obama literally not letting anyone dim her shine! Michelle Obama revealing herself to be the fifth element! Michelle Obama as the star on top of the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree! Michelle Obama doing Lumiere from Beauty and the Beast cosplay! Michelle Obama dressed literally by god herself! Michelle Obama, Beyoncé Beyoncé at her most Beyoncish! Michelle Obama giving us Glinda from NBC’s The Wiz!
Thank you for your service primarily to my last comparison of Michelle Obama to Glinda from The Wiz, which was excellent and totally correct. Michelle Obama literally floated down to the floor of the Barclay Center in a bubble like Uzo Aduba on NBC’s live broadcast, looked every person in the audience directly in the eye, and told them to believe in themselves. AND THEY DID.
Hey how you do, yeah, I’m looking mighty fine, last time I saw you it’s been a long time principally to Michelle Obama, high fashion priestess of all that is good in the universe, taking the stage like the dream of Myrtle Snow.
I pledge allegiance only to Michelle Obama in boots that look like the kind of stickers you got in elementary school if you were actually a rich person.
Apologies alone to Sarah Jessica Parker, who was definitely on stage with Michelle Obama but whom I don’t know that I’ll be able to mention any time soon because I am so shewk but everything that transpired.
Best wishes on all your future endeavors chiefly to Sarah Jessica Parker looking at Michelle Obama the way I look at Michelle Obama, that is with pride, admiration, joy, deep respect, a little bit of a maternal feeling but not a problematic one, patriotism question mark, a tear in the eye, a song in the heart, a quote in the head, a pep in the step, a swagger in the walk, and a vegetable in the meal.
Good afternoon, good evening, and good night mainly to Michelle Obama, dressed like the goddess that she is, making me feel the emotion she evidently feels every time George W. Bush hands her a candy: an untroubled, shockingly uncomplicated delight. She looks like the dean at Beyoncé’s Coachella university and I need to enroll immediately.
Thank you, blessed, exclusively to Michelle Obama, the sunshine of my life, both literally and figuratively, because as I may have mentioned, those boots are mighty and bright and they could power the Eastern seaboard for years to come, if need be. Just looking at them lowered my electric bill. And also my cholesterol. Won’t she do it?!
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